Thursday, March 3, 2016

Liturgy



It's been awhile.

Since I've been in a church, I mean.


But this morning I joined the Episcopalians for liturgy.

I know very few people with a linear faith, who have never
wavered,
doubted,
wondered, if.


I'm certainly not one of them. And I don't know if I envy them or not.


But I think not.


Because the opposite of faith isn't doubt at all.


It's certainty.


The lines of my faith are
variegated,
intersecting,
and tangled.


I trace and retrace the same steps to make sure they're still imprinted in the floor,
and sometimes I find them missing.


And I go looking.


For days,
for months,
for years.


And then, sometimes, I stop and sit awhile


and look up.


And find them dancing on the ceiling.







2 comments :

  1. Lovely post.
    The past year has been a big one for my beliefs, and I'd be lying to say they're sorted out at the moment, but it's always nice to find another transparent about these feelings.

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    Replies
    1. I just keep telling myself that the process is really the point. The way I see it, the minute I think I have it all figured out is the moment I can be sure I'm wrong. A god small enough for me to fully understand is a god too small to worship, so I've stopped being ashamed about not having all the answers. <3

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